When Dylan Lauren, proprietress of the New-York based Dylan's Candy Bar franchise and daughter of fashion designer Ralph Lauren, married her longtime boyfriend Paul Arrouet in June, all eyes were naturally on the stunning bridal gown, designed by the daddy of the bride. (All lips were on the candy-themed dessert bar designed by the bride.) But what inquiring minds wanted to know was: would the bride be a changer or a keeper?
Turns out she's a keeper. According to the post-wedding announcement in the New York Times Weddings and Celebrations section ("the single woman's sports pages" according to Carrie Bradshaw), "Ms. Lauren, 37, is keeping her name".
Statistically, it makes sense. While there is nothing wrong with the sound of Dylan Arrouet, the fact that the bride is in her thirties and a successful independent businesswoman, means there was a high likelihood she would not change her name. Or maybe she happened to read a recent study that claims women who keep their maiden names have higher earning power. Can't hurt, hmmm?
The Dutch revelation
An interesting study was published in 2010 by the Tilburg Institute for Behavioral Economics Research, at Tilburg University in Holland. Titled, "What's in a Name? 361.708 Euros: The Effects of Marital Name Change", the researchers found that a women's name often provides cues upon which people made judgments — in particular, those making career-influencing, income-affecting judgments. From the study:
"A woman who took her partner's name or a hyphenated name was judged as more caring, more dependent, less intelligent, more emotional, less competent, and less ambitious in comparison with a woman who kept her own name. A woman with her own name, on the other hand, was judged as less caring, more independent, more ambitious, more intelligent, and more competent, which was similar to an unmarried woman living together or a man. Finally, a job applicant who took her partner's name, in comparison with one with her own name, was less likely to be hired for a job and her monthly salary was estimated €861,21 lower (calculated to a working life, €361.708,20)."
That's nearly $1,200 a month, or almost $500,000 over a career! As much as we hate to be stereotyped, that kind of financial impact is worth taking a pause to consider. Would you rather be deemed as caring and emotional or make an extra half a million? We know what our husbands would say…
Most women take husband's name
Despite any perceived economic advantage, taking a husband's name is still very much the norm. According to a study by the American academic journal, Social Behavior and Personality, in the 1990s, the number of women keeping their maiden names peaked at 23 percent. Since then, it dropped to 18 percent in the 2000s.
According to name change website, I'm a Mrs. (imamrs.com), 82 percent of Canadian women eventually change their name after marriage. In a 2009 survey, I'm a Mrs. found that 46 percent of women across Canada adopted their partner's name within three months of marriage, 8 percent chose to hyphenate, and only 7 percent chose to keep their maiden names.
Fame and age factors
Women in medicine, the arts or entertainment are the most likely to retain their own names. This makes sense given that in the competitive world of scientific publishing and the arts, name recognition is critical. As American theater actor George M. Cohan said, "I don't care what you say about you, as long as you say something about me, and as long as you spell my name right."
Another study in 2010 called "Names: A Journal of Onomastics", found that women who married between the ages of 35 to 39 were 6.4 times more likely to keep their maiden names than those who married when they were 20 to 24 years old.
The French exception
All brides in Quebec keep their maiden names, not by choice but by legal decree. Under Quebec civil law, a married woman must go through a legal name change process in order to take her husband's name, and these are not always accepted. It would be interesting to know if the women of Quebec earn more than their Anglophone sisters as a result of their name retention.
Changer, keeper or both?
Many women today, stuck in their decision to change or keep their name after marriage, end up choosing a hybrid version — retaining their maiden name at work, while using their husband's name in personal situations. As well, many women keep their own name until they have children, at which point they switch to their husband's name in order to create a unified sense of family branding.
Changing names is a highly personal choice — as many women are eager to shed their birth names as those who are reticent about letting go of the name with which they grew up. If you find yourself on the fence about it, those Dutch researchers and their suggestion of half a million extra income might just be the tipping point for you?!
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